Sunday, March 30, 2014

Mozambique Talks

What does Mozambique tell Hannah?


Your breath smells bad if you eat hot food.
Michael Jackson is alive.
Michael Jackson is probably living in Brazil.
Michael Jackson is Mexican.
Dust ruins everything.
I will marry you.
You will marry me.
You need to marry in Mozambique.  I will find you a man.
You left your husband and child(ren) at home?
You are Italian, yes?
You are Spanish, yes?
You are Portuguese, yes?
You are Brazilian, yes?
You are from Maputo?
Take me back to wherever you are from.
I’m not sure Osama Bin Laden is dead.
Something really bad will happen if you don’t take a bath before dinner.
I am planning to have 2 or 3 wives.  This is a good number.
Do you have onions and oil? I want to make an onion salad.
There’s a potion you can put around your house that makes would-be thieves freeze like Medusa’s victims for you to find them and exact punishment later.
The United States has at least one person in every country to control what happens in that country.
If you’re pregnant, you can’t eat eggs.
North America is cold.
Spanish is badly spoken Portuguese.
Sitting provokes thoughts.
Quiet people are troublemakers.
You should move nationality – Mozambique would let you be Mozambican, yes?
You need to learn to like Mozambican music.
White women with cars steal children to sell their organs in Malawi.

Happy (Almost) April!

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